Summary: People often hold onto false beliefs because staying connected to their social group feels more important than accepting facts. Changing someone's mind works best through friendship and kindness, not argument or criticism. To help ideas grow, focus on sharing good beliefs and avoid repeating bad ones.
And the best place to ponder a threatening idea is in a non-threatening environment. As a result, books are often a better vehicle for transforming beliefs than conversations or debates. (View Highlight)
The brilliant Japanese writer Haruki Murakami once wrote, “Always remember that to argue, and win, is to break down the reality of the person you are arguing against. It is painful to lose your reality, so be kind, even if you are right.” (View Highlight)
This, I think, is a good method for actually changing someone’s mind. Develop a friendship. Share a meal. Gift a book.
Be kind first, be right later. (View Highlight)
